Short & Tall Tales in Goose Pimple Junction by Amy Metz

Author:Amy Metz [Metz, Amy]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Tags: General Fiction
Publisher: Southern Ink Press, an imprint of Blue Publications
Published: 2015-09-04T04:00:00+00:00

That’s crazier than a dog in a hubcap factory.

~Johnny Butterfield

“Welcome aboard, Chief.” Four officers and Bernadette stood in the reception area of the Goose Pimple Junction Police Department, figuratively and literally applauding Johnny’s arrival.

“Thank y’all. Thank you very much.” He shifted a cardboard moving box from one huge arm to the other and reached out with his other hand to take the ball cap that Skeeter Duke handed him.

“We got you a little welcome to the department gift. It ain’t much . . . ”Skeeter shrugged.

Johnny looked at the navy blue hat with white lettering. “GPJPD. Whew, good thing this town doesn’t have a longer name. It wouldn’t fit on a ball cap. But thank you. I’ll wear this with pride.” Everyone looked at him expectantly, so he added, “But not in the building.”

The men took turns shaking hands with the new chief and clapping him on the back. Bernadette looked at him over her reading glasses. “You refrain from calling me a little lady, and we’ll get along just fine.”

“I will show you the same respect I do the officers. And if you refrain from telling me what to do, we’ll get along just fine.” Johnny flashed his lopsided grin, and Bernadette’s stern face turned sheepish.

Her ramrod straight posture drooped a little. “Okay, okay, alpha dog established. Can’t blame a girl for trying.”

Johnny nodded. “It will take some time for us to get to know each other’s idiosyncrasies, but I want all y’all to know I’m a straight shooter. I don’t tolerate gossip or backstabbing. If you’ve got something to say, you say it. My motto is plain talk is easily understood. If anyone ever has a problem with me, you come to me first. I want to be the first to hear about it. And I’ll afford you the same courtesy.” Everyone nodded.

The phone rang, and Bernadette went around the desk to answer it. In a moment, she hung up and turned to Johnny. “Chief, we got us another situation. That was a call from Jackson Wright reporting Lou’s sister is missing.”

“Missing? Whatta you mean missing?”

“I mean missing. Gone. Absent. Misplaced. Nobody’s seen her. Apparently, some ne’er do well told the hospital Louetta gave him authorization to check out Ima Jean. That was the last anybody’s seen her. ”

“Don’t that beat all.” Johnny slapped his cap against his thigh.

“Yeah. It sure does. Jack and Tess went to Abingdon where Ima Jean lives, but no one has seen hide nor hair of her or Chester.” She pushed a pencil through her helmet-like hair. “I just can’t believe she’s been kidnapped.” Bernadette rested her hand over her heart as if to calm its beating.

“Now, now. Nobody said anything about abduction yet.”

“What would you call it? She’s AWOL. Unaccounted for. Vanished into thin air. And she was last seen with that man.”

“Put out a BOLO. Then get me whoever’s in charge of law enforcement over in Abingdon.”

Bernadette whirled around to get to work. Johnny headed for his new office.

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